Chook Me!

Lol How Embarrassing!!! [Star If U Like Plz ]?

The supermarket had a sale on boneless chicken breasts. I intended to stock up. At the store, however, I was disappointedto find only a few skimpy prepackaged portions of the poultry, so I complained to the butcher lady. "Don't worry," she said, "I'll pack some more trays and have them ready for you by the time you finish shopping." Several aisles later, I heard the lady butcher's voice boom over the public-address system: "Will the gentleman who wanted bigger breasts please meet me at the back of the store." What A Difference 31 Years Makes! 1970: Wore long hair 2001: Longing for hair 1970: Sitting around thinking of the perfect high. 2001: Sitting around thinking of the perfect high yield mutual fund. 1970: Finding a friend to split the price of a keg. 2001: Finding a friend to take me to have an EKG. 1970: Sitting through sessions of Acid Rock. 2001: Sitting through sessions of Acid Reflux. 1970: Thinking of moving to a real kool place. 2001: Thinking of moving to a real warm place.. 1970: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with my mother and sister. 2001: Watching John Glenn's historic flight with my grown children. 1970: Trying to look like Richard Roundtree or Ron O'Neal. 2001: Trying NOT to look like Richard Roundtree or Ron O'Neal. 1970: Chewing on seeds and stems. 2001: Chewing on lots of roughage. 1970: Popping pills, smoking joints. 2001: Popping joints, needing those pills. 1970: Noting our president's struggle with Fidel. 2001: Noting our president's struggle with fidelity. 1970: Admiring JACK PAAR. 2001: Joining AARP 1970: Avoiding Killer weed. 2001: Avoiding Weed killer. 1970: Hoping to "get lucky" on a date. 2001: Hoping you won't catch anything from your "lucky" date. 1970: Reading about The Grateful Dead. 2001: Reading about Dr. Kev 1970: News stories of people growing pot. 2001: The reality of growing a pot belly. 1970: Getting out to a new, hip joint. 2001: Getting a new hip joint. 1970: Listening to the Rolling Stones. 2001: Struggling with Kidney stones. 1970: Yelling, "Screw the system!" 2001: Reminding yourself to, "Upgrade the damn system!" 1970: Throwing the Peace sign. 2001: Watching the Mercedes logo. 1970: Friends who wouldn't get their hair cut. 2001: Children begging to get their heads shaved. 1970: Talking to friends about taking acid. 2001: Talking to friends about taking antacid. 1970: Proud to be passing the driver's test. 2001: Barely passing the vision test. 1970: "Whatever" was a typical response. 2001: "That Depends" is the way to go.

Public Comments

1. This is retarted. Your supposed to ask questions not tell jokes.
2. I agree it's kind of lame (watching Glenn's flight in 1970??? I don't think so), but this is the joke section, so mellow out Onerom.
3. ur first one was the only good one lol
4. i have to agree with ramjid, the first joke was the funny one .. the rest is kinda lame.. sorry.. ^^
5. It's funny-and true!