Chook Me! - Called Children Protection , Did i do the right ting?

Called Children Protection , Did i do the right ting?

I did one of the most hardest thing in my life, i called my sister into CS two days ago. Reason being she has four girls and i worry for them dearly and want to see them all get help. As for why i feel i should've called here's some issue going on in the house Dad is a truck driver never home three of the kids are on school only one is home all day with her. Mom got angry one day that the house was a mess and kids where watching tv so she tore the tv, cable box outta the wall in front of all of them and threw it and broke it. Mom and Dad constantly argue always in front of the kids one incident led to my sister getting so mad that the kid closest to her she beat on and dad saw it and didn't stop it, kid tells me momma does it all the time to me only because she knows i'll forgive her. Thrid kid whom is 6 she tells she hates her because she doesn't listen to her mother she's a major daddy's girl Oldest is 12 and is the only one with a different father that hasn't been in the picture much and when she ask to contact him mom's repsonse is no shut up go to your room your grounded. Also the 12 year old with her teenage attidue gave her dad a rolling eye look and he threw a stapler at her lucky it missed. Family has chickens and children go threw the coop barefoot sometimes and with shoes on and wear same shoes threwout the house litter box is in dining room but is always kept clean thanks to the dog eating it. Moms broke phone and threw it against a wall in front of kids after an argument with dad on the phone...for the second time House is cover in ants and sour milk order fills the girls room. two yougest sharing bed one still wets the best often sheets are cleaned but no like bed mat to catch the pee so it's soaking into the mattress 6 year old went to start kindergarten almost couldn't because she hadn't had shots since she was 12 months old oldest has a cavity very painful mom gave her something for the pain for a few days but never made an appt because she stop complaining about the pain (notes kids all have state health care ) Mom tells children she hates them calls them stupid and the B word. Mom will complain about their live in father and verbal abuse him in front of the children along with verbally abusing the children themselves Children are not regular showered oldest whom is 12 will shower everyday others i have to remind my sister to make sure they shower once a week. mom is lucky to shower once a week. There's much more I called CPS not because i want her to get in trouble i want her to get help i want the whole family to get help. Did i do the right thing? Did i just destory their family and emotionally reck the children now? Did i have any other options? More info i guess: She doesn't know that i called yet we spoke about issues in the house yestreday and she express that she won't get help she's trying the best she can she gets very defensive so i'm careful how i say things but there's always an excuse for every action she takes that's abuse to her family even beating her kid she says her hubby watched it and didn't stop her so it couldn't of been that bad... I don't know how to respond to that. it's like she doesn't get it Dad does konw that i called his repsonse I've emotionally destroyed his family now. I responded "you don't think how you guys treat those kids hasn't already done that anything i've done will just help them" and i ended it at that. to repsonde to MOI response THanks for your opinion but to add I do help my sister A LOT everyweekend i will take two of the four children. I attempt to babysit all four all the time so mom and dad can go on dates but dad always has an excuse not to go out. I"ve even given my sister my lexapro which is an pill to help with anixety which she said helped but won't go to the dr to get her own. I talk to her for an average of four hours a day to help her get threw whatever comes up next. I know they won't take the kids that wasn't my goal My goal was to get everyone in that house some helps if it cause me too lose my sister well atleast i know what i did was sincre i tried to help she's beyond the sort of help that i can offer that's why i called cps Hope this helps you understand more and lessen your thoughts on me calling CPS

Public Comments

Yes, I think you did the right thing. If they do not take any action, please keep calling them.
I think you did the right thing. My sister is just as bad with her kids.
Honestly it is tough to tell with the CPS thing... Lots of times they go into homes where they are not needed and disrupt lives, and then sometimes they go into homes where they are needed and do nothing... Just keep an eye out on your young nieces and try to help the mom to become a better person... Good luck
Yes, absolutely. Let your sister live like that herself. Her kids don't need to be dragged into her horrid lifestyle. They deserve much better.
I think you did the right thing - your gut told you something needed to be done and you did what you knew to do. Your sister will never know it was you. Hopefully they all get the help they need.
Its hard to say...some things you described sound like a typical hectic family although the mom does have anger issues ( throwing cable box) but other things near the bottom are definately things that I would be very concerned about too...you know her and her situation better than we do and if you felt it was bad enough to warrant intervention then I think you did the right thing...too many people sit back and do nothing when deep down they know its wrong. Its too late to have second thoughts, just know that you did it because you love them and are worried and if its the only option you felt you had then you need to know that you did the right thing.
it was the best decision to make at that time.
Yes you did the right thing. You did nothing but try to help. Ihope it works out.
I'm not sure how many of the things your sister is doing are actually illegal. Outside of the possible physical abuse and verbal abuse...and it will only help the kids if they find evidence of this when they visit the house, or the kids confirm it. There may not be much that can be done by children's services. However, they may offer her some resources to get herself some help...either through parenting classes or counseling or something along those lines. I hope things work out for those kids. Your sister sounds like she is very stressed out and does not know how to handle it.
I cant imagine how hard that must have been for you, but know that you did the right thing. The kids have to be protected and deserve a loving, safe home to grow up in. Wishing you well !
Yes you did the right thing. I had to do the same to my sister,even though it hurt me to do it,i had to for the sake of my nieces. If you hadn't called Cps you would of been just contributing to the abuse those girls are goin through. Maybe your sister will wake up and see she needs to be a better mother to these girls. Stay strong and hopefully everything will work out for the best.
You did the right thing. You're just looking out for the kids & it's a good thing too cause it sounds like no one else there is. Just keep up with CS. If no actions are taken soon keep calling. You're not destroying anything, you're trying to save the kids.
I think you did the right thing assuming you had already spoken to her and raised your concerns about whats going on. What did she say? Was she making any effort to make things better? She sounds as if she is suffering from depression or something. Hope she gets some help soon.
yes you shoudl of done it sooner and u didnt reunion her family or kids she has alreaedy done that..dont worry you will see you did the right thing just hope she doesnt stay to her old ways
I think you done what your heart told you to do. Which at this time is right. You are trying to get them help, she may be mad at first, but in the long run she should be greatful. If she isn't , then she needs to have her children taken away and she live by herself. As a mother, I will live and die for my son. He is my world. His safety and well-being is my #1 thing. Nothing comes first. Not my b/f (his father), not my other family..nothing. Some people just are not mean't to be parents. But, you did do the right thing. Hang in there, maybe something good will come out of this bad situation....God will be there, pray, he will give you the answer you need.
You did the right thing... but keep following up with DHHS. I know they can slack a lot and not follow up like they should. :-(
well you wanted other peoples opinions so try not to get too offensive but what you did was totally wrong and unforgivable in my opinion....you just dont do that to family.....now if she was putting poison in their food or something along those lines then maybe i would have a different opinion....what you should have done is offered to come helpclean the house or payed someone to,offered to take the kids off their backs for awhile so she/they can have a break...everything you have said about her sounds like shes in total depression....its great that you care about those kids but you could have helped them in many other ways and you could have heped your own sister as well.....there are so many other things you could have done besides calling protective services...and you can pretty much forget aout ever seeing your sister anymore and probably those kids as well..and i dont think anything that you have described here would be grounds to have the kids removed from your sister anyways....I mean dont get me wrong,i totally understand why you were upset and concearned and all of those things you mentioned are bad but i dont think theyre bad enough to have them removed...and some of the things you mentioned,as bad as they sound,i think a lot of people have had the same issues/made the same mistakes,etc....I think you jumped the gun and should have put more thought in what the best way tp help your sister and those kids could have been....this is just my opinion of which you asked for.......
You gave it a lot of thought before you called which was good. To call CPS is an incredibly hard decision to make but you were brave enough to go through with it. Kids living in filth with a mother that is modeling what to do when you're in an angry mood is enough to label her a bad mother. And for the father to sit around knowing that she is abusing the kids is just astounding. The kids deserve so much better. Sounds like they haven't had a very good start in life. Makes me wonder why some women have babies at all. If they don't enjoy the first one, why bother doing it again and again??? Why is too that those type of women tend to have the most children? Sad. I wouldn't trust CPS to reliably assess the situation for what it is. They turn a blind eye to so much and it's mostly because there is such a lack of options, especially when you're talking about as many kids in one family as your sister has. I don't know how close you live to the family and I'm sure it pains you when you do visit, but could you have your nieces over to your place more often? Is there no other family that shares your point of view that can offer to help as well? Well, at the very least, your sister is no aware that there are people watching her and she had better be on better behavior. She hopefully knows she's not going to get away with this kind of parenting she has up until now. There's no sense trying to talk sense into her. She's in too much of a way of life but if you can save just one of her kids, then more power to you.
CPS is there for a reason, to protect children. Sometimes they go too far, but that is a different question. CPS won't take a call unless you describe events happening that meet their criteria. For instance if you called and said "My sister moves so much that her daughter is an emotional wreck" they would tell you that they can't do anything about that. So if they took your call and will investigate then you have nothing to feel bad about, there is obviously some issues that need to be addressed. One of my values is to protect those who can not help themselves and this is all that you were doing. CPS will step in, force your sister to change, or she will loose her kids. If she doesn't change, then the kids might be better off.
Yes, you did the right thing, your sister needs to realize there is somthing wrong so she can start fixing it and if she isn't going to realize it herself then you did the right thing because someone else is going to have to make her see the problems. Her and her familly all sound like they really need to go to therapy and your sister needs parenting classes. You also shouldn't be giving her the lexapro, you could get in trouble for it and it might not be exactly what she needs, her dr needs to be the one to choose what she should be on.
yes you did the right thing , now the kids really need your support , if they cant live with you make sure you visit them lots and take them out , remind them they still have family that love them
Yes, you absolutelyy did the right thing. You could also anonmously contact the schools they go to and ask the schools to document any odd behavior they observe from the girls and ask them to report it Child protection services.